Triskaidekafiles

Triskaidekafiles is a love letter to cheesy cinema from the 80s and 90s, with the occasional dip into other eras.  if you're a fan of MST3K, Elvira, Joe Bob Briggs, or just bad horror movies in general, Trisk is the place for you.

Naked Fear (1999)

NAKED FEAR

WRITER: Greg Lamberson

DIRECTOR: Greg Lamberson

STARRING: Robert Sabin as Camden
Tommy Sweeney as Randy
Peggy Crown as Julie
Terry Spivey as Donald

QUICK CUT: Camden gets a new roommate and broadens his horizons.

THE MORGUE

Camden - A shut in who hasn’t left his home since his parents were gunned down right outside the door. He’s a nice guy, a little awkward, but probably less than you would expect for someone who had spent a decade removed from society. He craves human connection, and will struggle against his fears.

Randy - Camden’s new roommate, who seems nice enough. He’s friendly, helpful, and understanding of Camden’s condition and unconventional lifestyle. He’s willing to help his new friend in any way he can.

Julie - A phone sex operator with a dark past that Camden befriends, and comes between the two roomies.

It took off it’s cape.

TRISK ANALYSIS: Welcome back, Triskelions! Happy Valentines day tomorrow, and that means it's time for our regularly scheduled Just Wrong love story. And while this week's entry isn't quite LOVE it is about obsession and friendship going too far.

This is also another movie by Greg Lamberson, and you may have noticed we're picking our way through his horror movies. It made sense to follow up Slime City with it's sequel, but uh, I don't know why I jumped back to Naked Fear, and not his follow up to the first Slime City. But we'll get there!

We come out swinging with a flashback dream of the lead character's parents leaving for a night out, and are instantly murdered by a mugger. We even get a nice Wilhelmina scream.

Criminals are a superstitious and cowardly lot, I shall become that which they fear. I shall become...a bat.

Grown up Camden wakes up from his nightmare, and we quickly learn he is agoraphobic, and hasn't left his house, pretty much since that night.

He lives alone, he gets everything delivered, and occasional visits from his friend and lawyer. Oh Camden, you would have loved the 21st century and DoorDash.

When his regular food delivery guy doesn't arrive, Camden is very suspicious, but these things happen. He gets the new guy his money, and gets him out of his apartment as quickly as possible.

Fear Window

Oh, Camden also likes to watch the prostitutes on the street below and fantasize about them. And when he's not doing that, he likes calling up 1-900 numbers, searching for that elusive human connection.

When Donald the attorney makes his regular visit, he tries to get Camden to see a doctor for his condition, but he refuses. He does however ask Donald to help him get a roommate. The loneliness has reached a point where he wants to do something about it.

So, Donald puts out an ad, and Camden sees various terrible options.

Rent a room with us, Danny.

But eventually a young man who has a tough punk but friendly vibe named Randy shows up, and the pair hit it off almost instantly.

Randy heads out to pick up his stuff and...we find out he's friends with the suspicious delivery dude from earlier. This is all a scam to get in and rob Camden blind.

We also get a sense that Randy does not like his buddy's girlfriend, and they get into an argument over it. But he then heads back to Camden's, to get him wasted, so they can empty out the apartment while he's knocked out.

Discount Damon Salvatore

Geeze, you stay inside all this time to protect yourself, and the ONE time you trust someone to move in...BAM. Just goes to show you, even hiding inside, the real world is gonna get you.

Randy doesn't exactly get Camden as wasted as he claimed, so when the break-in finally happens, Camden hears the noises and goes to investigate.

He finds an open window, and his former delivery man in the living room. He threatens Camden with a gun, but Randy slides out of the shadows and grabs the would be thief, making stabby until he is very dead.

Do I have something on my face?

Camden realises they have a dead body, and he doesn't exactly want to let more strangers in his house, and he REALLY doesn't want to go out to see the cops. Randy says he'll take care of this in the morning.

Oh good, in the morning, in the meantime I will just SLEEP NEXT TO THE FUCKING CORPSE!

They wrap the body up in the carpet, and Camden asks what are they gonna do now. Randy says they both need to get a good night sleep. Camden rightly points out he can't exactly sleep WITH A CORPSE IN THE NEXT ROOM!

Damnit, stop taking my jokes!

Randy gives Camden some pills to help him sleep, and I am amused that NOW he knocks Camden out.

Little. Yellow. Different.

The landlord shows up the next morning to measure windows to install bars on them, under Randy's request, and Camden makes up a story about the rolled up carpet. He surprisingly buys it.

Meanwhile, Randy Rooster meets up with another old roomie, buys some drugs off him, and gives them to the delivery guy's girlfriend, to take care of her as well.

Finally though, he returns home to dispose of the body, but wouldn't you know it? Just as they're dragging the carpet out, David shows up to meet the new tenant.

Randy ducks into the bathroom with the corpse, and says to tell the guy he's taking a shower. He eventually comes out, hair wet, and makes a good first impression.

Next time, I’m killing a guy on a diet…

While his roommate is out, Camden calls another 1-900 number to talk to Julie. She can sense something is off though with his lies, so Camden comes clean, says who he really is, and is very open and vulnerable. Somehow, they hit it off. Camden is REALLY good at making friends.

That night, Camden gets woken up from a knock on his bedroom door. It's Randy, who has picked up the hooker Camden keeps eyeballing through the telescope.

Unfortunately, Camden has too much anxiety over the whole thing, and instead of doing anything, the two just have a friendly chat. See what I mean??

This place has had more people in it in the last three days than in the whole ten years combined.

We also find out Camden has a date, so Randy happily leaves to give the two potential lovebirds some privacy.

Things go well, considering the date must be contained to the single apartment, but Julie scurries away the instant things get too intimate.

Randy asks how things went, and then heads out for the night...to murder the prostitute. When the murder hits the news later, Camden immediately recognises the name. When he looks down to the street to be sure, he sees her pimp staring back.

Smile! You’re on Camden Camera!

He's all paranoid about the pimp, and to keep a long story from getting any longer, when he tells his fears to Randy, the roomie eventually takes care of THAT too.

Meanwhile, Julie comes back over, and explains what happened; she was sexually assaulted , and isolated herself because of it. Ah, I see why these two hit it off so well. They get each other.

With the air cleared and common ground found, the two head to the bedroom to sort through their issues. And by sort through their issues, what I mean is, have sex.

New carpet for the next victim!

Cam hears about the pimp's murder on the news, and sees Randy still has the gun from the burglar. He's starting to rethink this whole roommate situation, so calls over Donald to take care of the situation.

When Randy comes back home to the bad news, he beats Donald to death right then and there.

Naturally, Camden is shocked by this turn of events, calls Randy psychotic, and ducks into the bathroom, locking the door. Just an ever smaller prison.

Randy declares that Cam wanted a best friend, and now they are friends 'til the end. And Cam needs to learn a few things about friendship.

I gotta do all the work around here…

Later that night, Camden has snuck back to his bedroom, and Randy wakes him up, sitting on the edge of his bed, and smoking. He reveals his past trauma of his mom locking him in the closet, trapping him for hours in total darkness. He is Cam's opposite; he's a claustrophobe.

Also, he admits more details to his parents dying in a fire, in the unsurprising revelation that he's the one who set it.

The next day, Randy heads out to piss on his parents' graves, and Cam ventures back out into the apartment. He makes an attempt to leave, but the vision of his dead parents keeps him inside.

Randy returns home, and Camden is nowhere to be seen. He soon finds his roomie in the closet, but Cam is ready for him. He staples Randy in the face, and shoves him into the closet. Just like mom used to make.

For the love of god, Montressor!

With that taken care of, Camden finally has the courage to leave his home, and we are treated to a lengthy montage of Camden entering the world for the first time in 10 years. I normally might complain about this sort of thing, but it feels earned.

He makes his way to Julie's apartment, hoping for a place to stay. She's more than happy to help, but as Cam is settling in, the news reports his old apartment burned down. Well, that's one way to get out.

That night, Randy breaks in, and captures Julie at gunpoint. Camden wakes up, to find his girlfriend handcuffed and kneeling on the floor, and Randy waiting.

Randy and Cam have a standoff, and the killer immediately clocks Julie for being messed up, and it's no wonder she found a nice harmless guy like Camden. But Randy can see Cam isn't that harmless, and the only thing stopping him from killing, is Randy's gun.

You feeling lucky, punk?

He forces Camden to try and rape Julie, probably her absolute worse nightmare scenario. Just as he's about to go through with it, Randy takes a swig of beer to savor the moment, and that gives Cam an opening to pounce.

They struggle for a bit, and Camden eventually gets the upper hand. And by the upper hand, I mean, the gun. Randy thinks he's gonna shoot him, but Camden proves how much better he is than Randy, and he's just going to send him to jail

Sending the claustrophobe to jail? In a tiny cell? Oh, that is MEAN. I like it.

But as Camden reaches for the phone, Randy rushes him, and thanks to quick reflexes, Cam gets out of the way. Unfortunately for Randy, he smashes right out the window, and we bookend the movie with another stock scream, the Howie.

“Did he learn to fly?” “Does bouncing count?”

TRISK ASSESSMENT

Video: It looks all right, but it’s clearly shot on video, and trying it’s best.

Audio: It sounds fine.

Sound Bite: “I'm not psychotic! Look who I killed; a whore, a pimp, and a lawyer. They were parasites!"

Body Count: A surprising amount, for how much this takes place in mostly one location.

1 - Not even two minutes in, and Camden's father is shot.
2 - And then his mother.
3 - Randy chokes and stabs the would be thief.
4 - Then he drugs the girlfriend so she overdoses.
5 - And then he stabs the hooker in an alley.
6 - And THEN he shoots the pimp
7 - Donald the lawyer gets pistol whipped to death by Randy
8 - Randy pulls a Hans Gruber

Best Corpse: The delivery guy/thief. He gets a well deserved demise, and we get to savor it for awhile, as Randy makes him nice and bloddy

Sex Appeal: Some brief nudity of removed tops for most of the main cast.

Blood Type - B: A solid amount of blood. Not too much, but well used, and in splashes here and there.

Drink Up! Every time there’s a new 1-900 number.

Movie Review: I love the small scale of this. It’s a very intimate movie, you really get to know and feel for Camden and his plight, even if he is just a tiny bit sleazy. Even Randy gets to come off as nice and charming, for all the rest of his issues. The plot has a few nice twists, and once the final act comes, the tension ratchets up nicely. Greg is probably going to be most remembered for Slime City, and that is a fine legacy right there. But I almost prefer the smaller scale, and more intimate character closeness of this movie, and the next one coming up. The acting is solid, Sabin has quickly become such a delight whenever I get to see him in a movie, and Tommy Sweeney does such a good job of riding that line between charming and dangerous. it’s easy to see why Camden would trust him, but still believable when things go off the rails. Being such a small film in it’s scale, this isn’t going to appeal to everyone, but it knows what it is, and it’s limitations, and I like where it lands. Four out of five staplers.

Entertainment Value: Like Lamberson’s other movies, this movie could be SO dark, especially with all the talk of rape and abuse, but he mixes in just enough humour, and of the right kind, to keep you entertained, and not make things relentlessly bleak. And the actors help sell the levity. The gore might not reach the wild heights of Slime City, but it does what it needs to do, and is done very well. The running gag of the 1-900 numbers that are both kinda weird, but absolutely 100% in line with how they were at the time, is fun, as well. If there’s one flaw, there’s maybe a few too many montages that kill some time when I’d like to get back to the plto, but that’s a fairly small quibble. Three out of five food deliveries.