Triskaidekafiles

Triskaidekafiles is a love letter to cheesy cinema from the 80s and 90s, with the occasional dip into other eras.  if you're a fan of MST3K, Elvira, Joe Bob Briggs, or just bad horror movies in general, Trisk is the place for you.

Warning from Space (1956)

WARNING FROM SPACE

WRITER: Screenplay by Hideo Oguni

DIRECTOR: Koji Shima

STARRING: Keizo Kawasaki as Toru
    Toyomi Karita as Hikari Aozora/Ginko
    Shozo Nanbu as Dr. Isobe
    Bontaro Miake as Dr. Komura
    Mieko Nagai as Taeko

QUICK CUT: Starfish aliens come to Earth for mysterious reasons, cause a panic in Tokyo, and decide to turn one of their own into a clone of a popular dancer to communicate with scientists with less screaming and terror.  Oh, and also, there's a planet about to crash into us.

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Hellbound: Hellraiser II (1988)

HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II

WRITER: Screenplay by Peter Atkins
    Based on a story by Clive Barker

DIRECTOR: Tony Randel

STARRING: Clare Higgins as Julia
    Ashley Laurence as Kirsty
    Kenneth Cranham as Channard
    Imogen Boorman as Tiffany
    William Hope as Kyle
    Doug Bradley as Pinhead

QUICK CUT: Pinhead is back, and this time so is Kirsty!  But also, so is Julia!  Actually, pretty much everyone is back, except for Kirsty's boyfriend.  Following immediately upon events of the first movie, Kirsty continues to deal with the puzzle boxes and Cenobites, as other people try to harness their power.  Oh, and also, chains!

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The Clones (1973)

THE CLONES

WRITER: Screenplay by Steve Fisher
    Original story by Paul Hunt and Lamar Card

DIRECTOR: Paul Hunt and Lamar Card

STARRING: Michael Greene as Dr. Gerald Appleby
    Gregory Sierra as Nemo
    Otis Young as Sawyer
    Susan Hunt as Penny
    Stanley Adams as Carl Swafford
    John Barrymore Jr. as Brooks Brothers Hippy

QUICK CUT: A scientist narrowly escapes a lab accident, but soon discovers there is someone running around with his face.  It's a running chase to figure out what's going on, before someone catches up with him and makes sure there's no duplicates.

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The Nostril Picker (1993)

THE NOSTRIL PICKER

WRITER: Screenplay by Steven Hodge

DIRECTOR: Mark Nowicki

STARRING: Carl Zschering as Joe Bukowski
    Edward Tanner as Vince Armstrong
    Laura Cummings as Jennifer Armstrong

QUICK CUT: A strange longer runs into a man who teaches him how to change his looks through magic.  Joe uses this ability to turn into a girl so he can stalk girls and kill them.  Yes, this is actually the plot.

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Prom Night (2008)

PROM NIGHT

WRITER: J.S. Cardone

DIRECTOR: Nelson McCormick

STARRING: Brittany Snow as Donna Keppel
    Scott Porter as Bobby
    Jessica Stroup as Claire
    Dana Davis as Lisa Hines
    Collins Pennie as Ronnie Heflin
    Kelly Blatz as Michael
    James Ransome as Detective Nash
    Johnathon Schaech as Richard Fenton
    Idris Elba as Detective Winn
    Jessalyn Gilsig as Aunt Karen Turner
    Linden Ashby as Uncle Jack Turner

QUICK CUT: After three years, a teacher obsessed with one of his students escapes to continue his quest to be with her, and everyone in the way be damned.  Oh, and it all happens at the most lavish prom ever.

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Night of the Lepus (1972)

NIGHT OF THE LEPUS

WRITER: Screenplay by Don Holliday and Gene R. Kearney

DIRECTOR: William F. Claxton

STARRING:  Stuart Whitman as Roy Bennett
    Janet Leigh as Gerry Bennett
    Rory Calhoun as Cole Hillman
    DeForest Kelley as Elgin Clark
    Paul Fix as Sherrif Cody
    Melanie Fullerton as Amanda Bennett

QUICK CUT: A small southwestern town gets overrun by bunnies.  Oh, and also, they get turned giant size, because no one's done a giant animal movie in awhile.

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Totem (1999)

TOTEM

WRITERS: Original story by Charles Band
    Written by Benjamin Carr

DIRECTOR: Martin Tate

STARRING: Jason Faunt as Paul
    Marissa Tait as Alma
    Eric W. Edwards as Len
    Tyler Anderson as Robert
    Sacha Spencer as Roz
    Alicia Lagano as Tina

QUICK CUT: A group of people find themselves at a mysterious cabin in the woods, trapped by a mysterious forcefield, and mysteriously forced to mysteriously kill each other for mysterious reasons and in a mysterious order.  Oh, and also, mysteriously enough, this is not the movie you're thinking of.

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April Fool's Day (2008)

APRIL FOOL'S DAY

WRITERS: Based on a screenplay by Danilo Bach
    Based on a screenplay by the Butcher Brothers
    Screenplay by Michael Wigart
    Story by Danilo Bach

DIRECTOR: The Butcher Brothers

STARRING: Taylor Cole as Desiree Cartier
    Josh Henderson as Blaine Cartier
    Scout Taylor-Compton as Torrance Caldwell
    Joe Egender as Ryan
    Jennifer Siebel as Barbie
    Samuel Child as Peter Welling
    Joseph McKelheer as Charles

QUICK CUT: A year after a tragic accident, a group of spoiled rich people start to be picked off one by one, until the person responsible admits to the murder.

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Leprechaun: Back 2 Tha' Hood (2003)

LEPRECHAUN: BACK 2 THA' HOOD

WRITER: Steven Ayromlooi

DIRECTOR: Steven Ayromlooi

STARRING: Warwick Davis as The Leprechaun
    Tangi Miller as Emily
    Laz Alonso as Rory
    Page Kennedy as Jamie
    Sherrie Jackson as Lisa
    Donzaleigh Abernathy as Esmeralda
    Keesha Sharp as Chanel
    Shiek Mahmud-Bey as Watson
    Willie C. Carpenter as Father Jacob

QUICK CUT: After a...successful return from space to an urban setting, the Leprechaun is going...back 2 tha' hood (sic) for more mayhem.  This time his gold is found by some inner city young adults who use it to better their life before the little green guy comes calling to collect.  Oh, and there's also wacky slapstick and pot

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Leprechaun in the Hood (2000)

LEPRECHAUN IN THE HOOD

WRITERS: Story by William Wells & Alan Reynolds and Rob Spera and Doug Hall
    Screenplay by Doug Hall and Jon Huffman

DIRECTOR: Rob Spera

STARRING: Warwick Davis as The Leprechaun
    Ice-T as Mack Daddy
    A.T. Montgomery as Postmaster P
    Rashaan Nall as Stray Bullet
    Red Grant as Butch

QUICK CUT: How do you follow up from going to space?  By going to the hood!  It's urban adventures with the Leprechaun!  Oh, and also there's rapping.

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Leprechaun 4: In Space (1996)

LEPRECHAUN 4: IN SPACE

WRITER: Dennis Pratt

DIRECTOR: Brian Trenchard-Smith

STARRING: Warwick Davis as The Leprechaun
    Brent Jasmer as Books
    Jessica Collins as Tina
    Tim Colceri as Metal Head
    Miguel A. Nunez, Jr. as Sticks
    Debbe Dunning as Delores
    Gary Grossman as Harold
    Rebekah Carlton as Princess Zarina
    Rick Peters as Mooch
    Geoff Meed as Kowalski
    Michael Cannizzo as Danny
    Ladd York as Lucky
    Guy Siner as Dr. Mittenhand

QUICK CUT: The Leprechaun is back!  AND THIS TIME HE'S IN SPACE.  Oh, and also, there's a mad scientist being turned into a spider.

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I Come in Peace (1990)

I COME IN PEACE

WRITER: Jonathan Tydor and Leonard Maas, Jr.

DIRECTOR: Craig R. Baxley

STARRING: Dolph Lundgren as Caine
    Brian Benben as Smith
    Betsy Brantley as Diane
    Matthias Hues as Bad Alien
    David Ackroyd as Switzer
    Jim Haynie as Malone
    Jay Bilas as Good Alien

QUICK CUT: A cop who trusts his gut is caught on the wrong side of some drug lords when a bunch of them gets massacred, and gets teamed up with a straight laced by the book FBI agent trying to solve the case.  Oh, and there's also an alien running around with killer CDs and trying to turn people into drugs.

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Blood Dolls (1999)

BLOOD DOLLS

WRITER: Charles Band

DIRECTOR: Charles Band

STARRING:

Jack Maturin as Virgil Travis
    Debra Mayer as Moira Yulin
    William Paul Burns as Mascaro
    Warren Draper as Harrison Yulin
    Nicholas Worth as George Warbeck
    Jodie Coady as Mercy Shaw
    Phil Fondacaro as Hylas
    Naomi McClure as Cindy Agami
    Jason Pace as Howard Loftus
    Venesa Talor as Cotton Baby
    Yvette Lera as Razor Baby
    Persia White as Black Baby

QUICK CUT: After a failed attempt at ruining reclusive and eccentric businessman Virgil Travis, the man takes it upon himself to seek revenge.  With living, killer dolls.  As one does.

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A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)

A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 2: FREDDY'S REVENGE

WRITER: David Chaskin

DIRECTOR: Jack Sholder

STARRING: Mark Patton as Jesse Walsh
    Kim Myers as Lisa Webber
    Robert Rusler as Ron Grady
    Clu Gulager as Mr. Walsh
    Hope Lange as Mrs. Walsh
    Marshall Bell as Coach Schneider
    Sydney Walsh as Kerry
    Robert Englund as Freddy Krueger

QUICK CUT: Things are nice and quiet on Elm Street, until a new family moves into the now-empty home of Nancy from the first movie.  That's when Fred rears his VERY ugly head once again, and has a plan to get back into the world.

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Bad Channels (1992)

BAD CHANNELS

WRITER: Screenplay by Jackson Barr

DIRECTOR: Ted Nicolaou

STARRING: Paul Hipp as Dan O'Dare
    Martha Quinn as Lisa Cummings
    Aaron Lustig as Vernon Locknut
    Michael Huddleston as Corky
    Victor Rogers as Sheriff Earl Hickman
    Charlie Spradling as Cookie
    Melissa Behr as Nurse Ginger
    Daryl Strauss as Bunny
    Roumel Reaux as Flip Humble

QUICK CUT: A local radio station is upgrading to a nationwide broadcast over station 66, on the same night that it just so happens to be overtaken by an alien looking to abduct a couple girls.  Hey, it happens!

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976-EVIL 2: The Astral Factor (1991)

976-EVIL 2: THE ASTRAL FACTOR

WRITER: Screenplay by Eric Anjou
    From a story by Rick Glassman

DIRECTOR: Jim Wynorski

STARRING: Patrick O'Bryan as Spike
    Rene Assa as Mr. Grubeck
    Paul Coufos as Stone
    Leslie Ryan as Paula
    Debbie James as Robin

QUICK CUT: Hey!  Remember that movie I reviewed five years ago?  It's baaa-ack!  In an almost totally unrealted story, that has at least some tennuous ties, like an evil horoscope phone line that seduces people to do evil deeds.

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Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981)

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 2

WRITER: Ron Kurz

DIRECTOR: Steve Miner

STARRING: Amy Steel as Ginny
    John Furey as Paul
    Adrienne King as Alice
    Kirsten Baker as Terry
    Stu Charno as Ted
    Warrington Gillette as Jason
    Walt Gorney as Crazy Ralph
    Marta Kober as Sandra
    Tom McBride as Mark
    Bill Randolph as Jeff
    Lauren-Marie Taylor as Vickie
    Russell Todd as Scott

QUICK CUT: Aaand we are back to not quite Crystal Lake.  We are Crystal Lake adjacent.  This time out, another camp has opened up for the summer, and the counselors have awoken Jason, bringing him to their camp for the summer.

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Frozen Scream (1975)

FROZEN SCREAM

WRITERS: Screenplay by Doug Ferrin, Michael Soney & Celeste Hammond
    Story by Renee Harmon & Doug Ferrin

DIRECTOR: Frank Roach

STARRING: Renee Harmon as Lil Stanjope
    Lynne Kocol as Ann Girard
    Thomas Gowen as Kevin McGuire
    Wolf Muser as Tom Girard
    Bob Rochelle as Kirk Richard
    Lee James as Sven Johnson
    Sunny Bartholomew as Cathrin
    Wayne Liebman as Father O'Brien

QUICK CUT: When one man dies, a cop reunites with his lost love, and the pair of them try to get to the heart of the mystery behind a strange group of cloaked figures, and frozen zombies.  Yeeeah, this is a weird one.

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Don't Look in the Basement (1973)

DON'T LOOK IN THE BASEMENT

WRITER: Tim Pope

DIRECTOR: S.F. Brownrigg

STARRING: William Bill McGhee as Sam
    Jessie Lee Fulton as Jane St. Claire
    Robert Dracup as Ray Daniels
    Harryette Warren as Jennifer
    Michael Harvey as Dr. Stephens
    Jessie Kirby as Danny
    Hugh Feagin as Sergeant Jaffee
    Betty Chandler as Allyson
    Camilla Carr as Harriet
    Gene Ross as Judge Oliver W. Cameron
    Anne MacAdams as Dr. Geraldine S. Masters
    Rosie Holotik as Nurse Charlotte Beale
    Rhea MacAdams as Mrs. Callingham

QUICK CUT: A new nurse arrives at a psychiatric hospital, but she soon discovers that things are not as they seem.  The dead bodies were kind of a clue.

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Christmas Evil (1980)

CHRISTMAS EVIL

WRITER: Lewis Jackson

DIRECTOR: Lewis Jackson

STARRING: Brandon Maggart as Harry Stadling
    Jeffrey DeMunn as Philip Stadling
    Dianne Hull as Jackie Stadling
    Joe Jamrog as Frank Stoller

QUICK CUT: A disturbed man slowly, very slowly succumbs to the holidays and gives into his obsession with Santa Claus, eventually becoming the crimson clad spreader of Christmas cheer and punishment.

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